Sapna Vaid

If children today could speak freely about their inner world, many might say, “I don’t know why I’m angry, but I am.” And honestly, can we blame them?

They are growing up in a world that demands a lot and explains very little. One minute, they’re told to be kind and compassionate. The next minute, they see cruelty being rewarded with views, attention, or even success. At school, they’re taught to work hard and follow the rules, but online, it’s the rebels, pranksters, and influencers who seem to win. This contradiction creates a deep moral confusion: Why should I be good if the world doesn’t always reward goodness?

Modern Day Parenting -II

Children today are over-stimulated and under-rested. Their minds are constantly shifting between school assignments, extra-curriculars, family expectations, and an endless stream of content. Instagram, YouTube, WhatsApp, Snapchat—they’re not just platforms; they’re loud, chaotic ecosystems where children are expected to perform, belong, and constantly update who they are. Even scrolling feels like a task—one reel after another, one trend after another. It’s not entertainment anymore; it’s survival in a peer-driven world where popularity is often mistaken for worth.

And yet, from the outside, many adults still label them as “lazy,” “addicted,” or “spoiled.” But what if they’re not lazy—just overwhelmed? What if the endless scrolling isn’t just a distraction, but an escape?

Most children today are quietly juggling identities. At home, they’re expected to respect traditions, greet elders, and sit through rituals they barely understand. At school, they’re taught to fit in, follow systems, and compete. Online, they’re nudged to stand out, be edgy, or be trendy. It’s a whirlwind of mixed messages. “Be yourself,” we say. But the moment they express something different—be it an opinion, a style, or a dream—we urge them to follow the path we think is better. Is it any wonder they’re confused?

Even their emotions are not spared. “Why are you so sensitive?” they’re told. “When we were your age, we just adjusted.” But here’s the truth: the world we grew up in no longer exists. Our “adjustment” was in a world without social media, 24/7 news, or cyberbullying. Their version of “normal” includes being judged by likes, being exposed to violence through screens, and being constantly reminded of what they lack compared to someone else.

And yet, most of them don’t have the language to explain what they’re going through. So, it erupts as anger, silence, and rebellion. Maybe it’s just the only way they know how to say, “I’m not okay.”

Peer pressure today doesn’t just come from classmates. It comes from influencers they’ve never met but follow religiously. It comes from trends that dictate how they should look, speak, behave, and even eat. If they don't keep up, they're “boring.” If they do, they’re “copycats.” It’s a no-win situation. Every choice they make feels like a test.

And in all of this, children are quietly craving something simple—structure and safety. A place where they don’t have to perform, compete, or explain themselves. A space where they can be messy, confused, or unsure—and still be accepted.

That’s where we, as adults, come in, but not as people with all the answers. Instead, as people who are willing to listen without judging. Children don’t always need us to fix their problems; they just want to be heard; seen not as projects, but as people.

They want to be allowed to feel tired without being called ungrateful. They want to question without being labeled disrespectful. They want to dream differently without being seen as rebellious. They want to know that even if they’re confused today, it doesn’t mean they’ve failed.

If we look closely, the emotional outbursts, the eye rolls, the slammed doors—they're not just tantrums. They’re language. They’re ways of saying: “I need space,” “I need understanding,” or sometimes, “I don’t even know what I need, but please don’t walk away.”

We often talk about children losing connection with their families because of gadgets. Maybe it’s not the screens alone. Maybe they’re retreating to those screens because they feel unheard in the real world. That’s where they get control - anything. In a world where everything feels uncertain, even choosing what video to watch gives a sense of autonomy.

We need to stop asking, “What’s wrong with kids these days?” and start asking, “What are they trying to tell us that we aren’t hearing?”

The truth is, parenting today is not just about giving guidance—it’s about learning a new language; one that isn’t made of commands or corrections, but curiosity and compassion.

ALSO READ: Challenges of parents in the age of likes, reels and emojis

So maybe children aren’t rebelling. Maybe they’re just crying for structure in a language we’re still learning to hear. And maybe it’s time we stop shouting over their silence, and start sitting beside it.

To be continued...